People with chronic pain have so many doctors appointments and so little time where they aren’t hurting so why should they add another appointment to their schedule? It’s not just about talking about your week and can have lasting benefits that ripple throughout all aspects of health.

Pain Impacts Stress and Stress Impacts Pain

People with chronic pain are so often dismissed and told that they’re just anxious. In most cases, this just simply isn’t true. That doesn’t mean stress and anxiety don’t play a part in the pain though. 

When someone is in pain their stress levels can skyrocket. This makes sense. They worry about the pain, their obligations, and what others will think. Pain can also increase your heart rate which can tell your body that you’re stressed even before your mind thinks it. This stress can be all consuming and exhausting. As the pain gets worse so does the stress. 

The problem is that stress can also worsen the pain. This doesn’t mean the pain is in their head. Stress is caused by cortisol and the change in cortisol levels can cause flare ups to underlying conditions through inflammation, nerve sensitivity, and more. 

This just becomes a vicious cycle because pain causes stress but stress worsens pain. The importance of finding ways to manage stress is extremely important to help manage the conditions. Migraines, CRPS, arthritis, even back pain can all be impacted like this but let’s be clear, eliminating stress from someone’s life completely will not cure them of their pain. It can just make managing that pain a little easier. 

Learning How to Advocate for Yourself

Doctors can miss things because of wording, limited time with patients, or because they just simply have a different thought process. Most of the time this doesn’t mean they are bad doctors but figuring out how to convey what’s going on in a productive way can save people so much time and stress in the long run.

People can say one thing but doctors are understanding it a different way. Sometimes this is as straightforward as doctors not asking follow up questions or because they have different definitions for words used. Fatigued vs tired is a great example. People may say tired when medically they mean fatigued and that difference can change what direction the doctor will take the appointment. This is also important when describing what the pain feels like. To some, pain is pain but being able to describe if it’s burning, tingling, sharp, dull, or aching can narrow down what might be causing the pain. Knowing that can lead to a quicker diagnosis or noticing changes in a condition. Women also tend to describe things completely differently compared to men. Men use less words and stick to the “important details” while women give more information in a narrative way. Although this can mean that women are giving more information that can be important to what’s going on, this can also mean more information is lost or worse, women can be seen as exaggerating or emotional. It can leave women being miss or underdiagnosed. Until this view changes, it’s important to learn how best to explain pain so that nothing is missed. 

There are also laws that many people don’t know unless they’re in the medical field. No Surprises Act and Good Faith Estimate are two great examples. One major stressor with chronic pain is how people are going to afford everything. This is when it’s important to have someone who understands the system can help give education around these things. Patients have to be given estimates for procedures by their doctors’ offices and if that estimate isn’t even close then patients might be able to fight those costs but only if they know the rules and who to talk to. Learning the right questions can prevent things from slipping through the cracks.

Many people with chronic pain can have what is commonly referred to as ‘white coat syndrome’ which is a fear of doctors. It can feel like doctors have all the control in the room and although that is true to an extent, patients are the boss in the room. This doesn’t mean they can demand things that aren’t medically necessary but it does mean they don’t have to do something they don’t want to. When someone has anxiety around doctors, it’s important to tell them and have them slow down the appointment. Doctors need to explain things and listen to their patient’s needs but there are ways to request this in a way that will be listened to more. Learning this can lead to a smoother appointment and less anxiety overall. 

These are ongoing conversations that need to be had so having one person to consistently go to will help people feel prepared and calmer for their appointments.

Talk About the Mental Health Ramifications of Procedures

Oftentimes people with chronic pain feel desperate for the pain to stop and end up doing procedures in the hopes that it will help. This is important but it’s also extremely important to talk about how those procedures can impact them emotionally. A therapist should never push for a specific procedure or talk someone out of one but they should talk about everything that can come up for a person mentally leading up to, during, and after the procedure. Doing this can help people feel more comfortable and confident with the procedure because they know what to expect and are giving informed consent. 

Before procedures, people can feel overwhelmed with what to do and with all the information being thrown at them at once. Talking this out with someone can help them come up with questions and sort through why they’re nervous about the specific procedure. It can help them better understand and advocate for themselves.

On the day of or during the procedure, clients can get nervous. Their heart rate can increase which can lead to the procedure being delayed which can lead to even more stress. Having the coping skills ready to go can make for a much smoother day.

After the procedure, things may come up that people haven’t even thought about before. For example, ports, leads, or scars can lead to body image issues or even struggling overall mentally over the fact that things look different. People can struggle with the lack of independence they have after procedures.

Upcoming procedures can come with hope but what happens if that procedure doesn’t work? They feel like they’re back at square one. People around them are also hopeful and having to tell them they are still in pain and watching the reactions can be crushing. No one should have to face this alone.

Regain Trust in the HealthCare System

The health care system can be hard for people who are dealing with chronic pain. They can be dismissed, talked down to, and passed from provider to provider. People are told they are drug seeking or that there’s nothing wrong with them when something clearly is. It’s no wonder people are skeptical about what their doctors say. 

Sometimes it’s a basic miscommunication. Doctors not understanding that the patient doesn’t know what they mean and the patients not knowing what questions to ask. Why is the doctor making them try a bunch of different medications knowing it won’t work? Simple, insurance. Sometimes insurance requires doctors to try different steps before insurance will cover the bigger procedure. But if people aren’t explained this then they might feel like the doctor is wasting their time. This is when someone who understands the system and can take more time with them can really help. 

We also can’t underestimate the power of someone who believes them. When people have been dismissed, misdiagnosed, or underdiagnosed then of course they might not trust the system. But when someone says they hear them and believe them and will help them can change how they view providers leading to better quality of care.

Have an Outlet to Let Out the Frustrations

Family and friends are great when they are supportive but what about when they aren’t? What about when they’re so supportive but don’t understand that sometimes staying positive isn’t what they need? People need someone they can be real with. Someone who won’t look upset and disappointed when they are having a bad day.

Family and friends want so badly for their loved one to feel better and it’s hard to tell them that they aren’t. Some will say to stay positive but sometimes they need to yell, cry, or even just vent! This gives them a dedicated time to be able to get it out without being told to have hope and look at the bright side. A dedicated space where they can say whatever they want. 

Reduce the Risk of Suicide

Some conditions come with an increased risk of suicide. Some of these include CRPS, migraines, arthritis, trigeminal neuralgia, and endometriosis. People just want the pain to stop and can often be depressed because their life isn’t what they expected it to be. In some conditions like CRPS, brain scans show this depression is unlike any other. It’s understandable that suicide can cross their minds but there should be someone monitoring to make sure this thought doesn’t become a reality. But this can’t always just be someone at home because people in pain don’t want to worry their support system. It’s also important to have someone involved who knows when it’s time to intervene, has the resources and knowledge to do so, and can do it in a supportive way that helps both the person and their family.

Have Someone Who Understands Even When They Can’t Understand

Not everyone will understand what it’s like to live with chronic pain. Even someone with chronic pain won’t understand everyone else’s chronic pain. It’s not about understanding the chronic pain but it’s about understanding that people with it aren’t being dramatic. It’s important to have someone who understands that the rain actually does make the pain worse. It’s comforting to have someone who doesn’t need to be walked through what every procedure is or even what the diagnosis is. 

Know That You’ll Have Someone to Talk

Chronic pain can be very isolating. People can get stuck in the house for days and if no one can come visit them, they will be all alone. Regular sessions give people something to look forward to and a time where they know they won’t be alone. This can do wonders for mental health and reduce the risk of depression.

Importance of Finding Someone Who Specifically Works With Chronic Pain

Not every therapist is the right fit for people with chronic pain. It’s important to find someone who understands chronic pain and how it truly impacts people day to day. This will change the way the therapist does their sessions.

Sessions may be on a schedule but flare-ups aren’t. If a therapist has rigid rules about rescheduling or cancelling then they might not truly understand the true scope or severity of what is happening with their clients. When a therapist understands how hard it is to do anything with chronic pain flare-ups, they will help find ways to make sessions work when clients can and in a way that clients can. 

Therapists who truly understand chronic pain will be up to date on the newer interventions, strategies, and procedures. They have more options to pull from while also understanding what interventions can cause more damage emotionally.

They don’t need every little thing explained to them. They’ve heard it all and if they haven’t then they research it so that their clients don’t have to take on the burden of educating their providers. 

They won’t look at clients with pity when the client says how much pain they’re in. They come from a place of empathy because even if they haven’t experienced it they understand it enough and have seen it enough to see where the client is coming from. You won’t find the generic “that sucks” sympathy phrases coming from them.

They know the systems so they know who to refer to and how to get their needs met. They spend time pushing for what the client needs and educating the people who don’t understand.

Chronic pain impacts every part of someone’s health and life. It’s important to have a team who is all on the same page including a mental health therapist. They will fight in your corner even on the hardest days.